Like private schools which (for reasons lost in the mists of starched collars, ink wells and latenight visits to matron) start with the third form, so BMW's model range also begins with its 3-series. However, the German giant has now decided to give completists a break by offering them the chance to 'collect the set' by introducing a 1-series. It's like Star Wars - a prequel to the main attraction. To find out why they didn't start with 1 in the first place, I gave my journalistic training a thorough work-out - and rang the press office. It seems BMW actually started with the 5, back in 1972. 'A mid-size number, for a mid-size car' was how they put it.
As befitting its number, the 1 is the baby of the Beemers. And, by a mere £305, it is also the cheapest. However, the price quickly rises to £20,800 for the precocious 120d. The small car's big claim to fame is that it is the only rear-wheel drive car in its class (back to school again). This means that it becomes what's known in car mags as a 'driver's car' - better handling, better control, more fun. The alternatives - ie all the other cars in the 'family hatch' category - are front-wheel drive, which apparently makes them less fun to drive. Can't say you'd notice, really, although the one huge advantage of rear-wheel drive is that it gives you a massively improved turning circle - which probably is useful outside the school gates.
Strangely, for me, BMW has chosen to advertise its 'rear-wheel drive for outstanding performance, handling', etc, with pictures of tortoises and tricycles. Neither of which are renowned for performance or handling. Maybe I'm being too literal. Anyway, to the car... From the outside it is a truly beautiful vehicle. It's been inspired by the marque's cultish z4. It has sculptural curves where others have hospital corners and undulating panels where others have flat sides. With its walrus-moustache valance, it's an eye catcher, no question - in silver it looks like a part of Bilbao's Guggenheim has been broken off and taken for a drive. Another neat external innovation is that the door handles are individually lit by fibre optics, making the car look even more like a Frank Gehry building in the dark.
That's all from the outside, though. On the inside, it scores slightly less well. It's cramped, even for a small car, the boot is pinched and leg-room seems to have been designed for people without thighs. There's a few odd design blips, too: brown plastic is never flattering, and there's little in the way of useful storage compartments.
The 2-litre engine brightens things up considerably, giving 0-60 in 7.9 seconds and an amazing 49.6 miles per gallon. It growls reassuringly. However, I found the steering a little heavy, reverse impossible to find and rearvisibility almost non-existent. Never look back, as they say.
As today's school system is based almost entirely on marks, it seems only right to give the 1-series a grade. I note that Top Gear awarded it 12 out of 20, which I think is a bit harsh. Let's go for a B.
