Oh dear. The timing of this one could not have been much worse. For three reasons, really. First off, we're going to a festival. Last week's big Volvo would have been ideal. How the hell are we, and all our stuff, going to get into this?
We do, somehow. That's not to say there is loads of space in a Toyota Aygo; there isn't – it's tiny. Mind you, you tend more to fill up the space you have, especially if you're going away, so if you don't have it, you can't fill it. And it means that our offspring are now buried under sleeping bags, etc, which could make the journey more peaceful. A lot of people could get away with smaller cars, that's what I'm saying.
Second, I've had an operation on my hand, meaning I can't actually drive. Again, not an insurmountable problem. My girlfriend can drive, tell me what the car is like, and I can pass it on, OK?
So, with a three-cylinder one-litre engine, it's not the most powerful car and you need to change down going up a slope, especially loaded up the way we are. Otherwise it copes perfectly well with a long motorway journey for which it's not really designed. Not the quietest of rides, but comfortable enough, and it doesn't feel too tiny and bully-able from the inside. As a passenger, I'm fine in the front, though I'd be in trouble if I had to go in the back.
The figures – fuel consumption and CO2 – are good. Whether or not you'd get this car really comes down to how much you like it. And I'm not smitten. It is a striking design, yes, especially from the front with its face like an X, but the Peugeot 108 we had the other day, which is built on the same platform, is a friendlier car, I think. A Fiat Panda, too, is jollier, and a VW up! and its relatives neater. I'm saying no thanks to an Aygo. Oh, and the sound system is a bit tinny, and there is nothing like a sad violin to show up tinniness.
Why the sad violin? Because of the third reason this is the wrong time for this bloody Aygo. My career as a motoring journalist is at the end of the road. This is not how I wanted to bow out; I was thinking more of a glamorous Italian supercar ending in an i, with hundreds of horsepower, burning rubber and a glorious scream as I accelerate into the sunset… There is a scream, but it's the muffled one of a child who is buried and fed up that we're not there yet; a scream the tinny stereo can't drown out.
I am a passenger in an overloaded little Toyota that's struggling with the hills, and that I'm finding impossible to love. Oh well, in my heart of hearts, I never really liked cars all that much anyway. Maybe you guessed. Toot-toot.
Toyota Aygo X-Clusive 1.0 litre 5-door manual
Price £11,695
Top speed 99mph
Acceleration 0-60mph in 14.2 seconds
Combined fuel consumption 68.9mpg
CO2 emissions 95g/km
Eco rating 8/10
Cool rating 6/10
